the point at which

the point at which you give up will be the point at which you remain for the whole of your life.” – brother alpha

of all the things that were said this week, that phrase has stayed with me ever since i first heard it.

this is not the point at which i want to be for the rest of my life. i don’t know where exactly is the place that i do want to stay in forever, but this is certainly, absolutely not it. neither is that place. no, not there.

it just seems so impossible for me to even realign myself towards the future i want to go to. what makes it worse is my inability to hear You, to listen to Your wisdom, so i can obey.

this is not the point at which i am going to give up. but i don’t know where to go.

you know you’re lost when you put pen to paper and realise your well of words has all dried up. there isn’t a poem in your heart, neither is there an impatient metaphor waiting inside. there’s nothing but an obstinate pen that refuses to write.

sigh.

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