a psychological condition in which a human or animal has learned to believe that it is helpless. it feels that it has no control over its situation and that whatever it does is futile. as a result it will stay passive when the situation is unpleasant or harmful.
i studied really hard for haemato. i could answer case questions before the exam. i panicked during the paper and was fortunate to pass. however, the situation led me to believe that it is futile to study hard because i will just scrape through anyway.
i studied really hard for gi. i can answer case questions now, before the exam. i am afraid i will panic during the paper and will once again barely scrape through. as a result, i am tempted to stay passive in this unpleasant and harmful situation.
that, ladies and gentlemen, especially those of you from sem1, is how you apply behavioural science.
but there’s also this “God” figure in my life who tells me that learned helplessness, especially in my circumstances, is absolute bollocks. all i really need to do is surrender it all to Him instead of taking things into my own hands, like i did the last time. i was just so frustrated after respi that i broke down for haemato.
to tell you the truth, i’ve never been more stressed in my life. even that “episode” in jc2 doesn’t come anywhere near this. i am pretty much close to giving up on my chances to change from a local to a twinning program.
i can’t end this post with an encouraging “…but i will try anyway” simply because i would really much rather lie in bed all day tomorrow and screw up the ica, then have a holiday-ish 5 weeks before eos and screw that up too.
as selfish and temporary and insignificant this all is…your prayers are greatly appreciated still. thank you.