“you know,” he said, “guys actually like it when women act like they’re damsels in distress who want to be rescued.”
at the time, i was just wowed by his straight-out-of-a-fairytale story of how he, a nice guy, got the girl. and so a light went on in my head and i thought…yeah, he’s right.
but then i see my peers pouting over the most trivial things, or squealing like they’re 12, or something along those lines and i think…HELL NO.
fine if that’s what the guys find attractive because it conforms to their borderline sexist views on women. if that’s what most men want, then they can have those girls. if that’s what society accepts, then i’ll step aside and let society walk on by.
i’d be lying if i say i have never tried acting cuter, being “sweeter”, or pretending to be manja in an attempt to be liked. but each and every time it ends with me feeling like a fraud and being absolutely disgusted with myself for resorting to the kind of behaviour that i can only barely tolerate on a good day. in moderate doses. not as who i am.
so yes i feel sorry for myself for being like this, and not like the kawaii girls who have a knack of being damsels in distress, always on the receiving end of kindness lest they burst into tears. i have the worse end of the deal and there is the occasional bitterness to address for the rest of my life.
but i’d rather face rejection as an emo kid who can’t cheer up than be who i am not.