eject

history repeats itself.

we vote dictators into power, watch them decline, install a new leader buoyed by hope and optimism, then watch him morph into his predecessor and prepare our offspring for the next decline. we fight wars for money and power under the guise of liberty and peace. we see children vow not to repeat the mistakes of their fathers but succumb to pressure, alcohol, the world, like their parents before them.

as for me…i fall. for the same pair of spectacles, sense of humour, insecurity. 10 years on and it’s the same person with the same emotional unavailability, the exact same tragedy, but with a different name. it’s all too uncomfortably familiar.

10 years ago, i chose to hope. it was the wrong decision and i paid dearly. time eventually did its work, but it’s time i can never get back. maybe this is my chance for redemption, to prove i’ve matured somewhat.

i don’t have another 10 years to spare. this is one part of my history that doesn’t need to be replayed.

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